I am fortunate enough to belong to a book club of intelligent, opinionated and funny women who love to read and love to digress. This past weekend my very civilized book club went off book topic and started to discuss strippers. Don't ask me how we fell into topic; it seems we often fall into controversial talks.
Because I am usually the most vocal and the most pushy of the group, I waited until I heard from the rest to offer my opinions. "D" started by stating that she was at a strip club and went into detail about a certain coin trick that was performed. At that point "T" clearly expressed her opinion that the topic, the profession and the all players involved are disgusting. "T" was done with it. Seems "DI" and "L", who are the eldest members of the group, were also pretty quiet and felt like "T". Ah it was my turn to keep the momentum going.
I am not sure exactly how I feel about the industry. I am fan of live and let live but I cannot believe that the industry is harmless to the dancers. There is no way I can believe that girls want to be objectified in this manner. It's not like topless dancer is right up there with doctor, lawyer, teacher, stockbroker. I feel most girls who enter the profession either do not see any other realistic (lucrative) choices or are dealing with significant self-esteem issues. So i already feel very bad for these girls. It's really the customers I have issue with.
Now I even cut the men a little slack, as I do believe they are the weaker gender. No doubt the dancers are salacious and that uneasy feeling of being bad may even be enticing for some men. But come on, is it really that much fun to act like animals? They have to realize its a business and its all an illusion. They also have to realize that these girls are daughters, sisters and sometimes mothers. I would guess that if every guy took one minute at a strip club to think about who these girls really are, they would not return. And if there are no customers there is no money. If there is no money in the business, the business closes.
Probably most guys i know, including my husband, have been to a Gentlemen's Club. Although I don't like it, I'm really not that angered by the occasional bachelor party. Maybe that's because it is extremely occasional and my husband doesn't really seem to care. I do think that a man's consistent or regular visits are systemic of a greater issue with him. Seek help.
I think we as women have a responsibility here. First we need to help girls realize their options. Not-for-profit organizations like WNY Women's Fund are fighting hard to attack the challenges facing women and girls. Donate. Second, we need to let our men know how we feel about these places. Not by screaming at them or forbidding them to go - which only makes it more enticing for them. You know if your hubby really wants to see a stripper, put on your granny undies, jump on the coffee table and pillage his wallet. Same result. :-)
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OK, I'm putting the grannies on right now. You know me....
ReplyDeleteAre you kidding me???? First, stripping derives from the oldest profession - prostitution. I am not saying prostitution is right (nor legal) but to think that it is the "weaker genders" fault because they show up at these places is ridiculous. And who stated that all men who attend these clubs are animals? Sure a few rowdy college kids who got drunk may be loud and obnoxious. But have you ever witnessed the girls reactions when they do? They love it. They eat it up because it provides them more money. The more seductive they dance, the more attention they give you, the more money they make. That is why girls do it. I knew a person who attended a club (a "friend" of course) who was speaking wit a lovely young college dancer. When this person asked why she dances, she simply stated "to pay off my credit cards". Does that make her a bad person? She s not shy with her body, has a personallity and can certainly work a room. What the hell is wrong with that? No, topless dancing is not on the same social level as a doctor or a lawyer, but those girls make a ton of money. I mean a TON. Who wouldn't choose that over a 12 - 4 shift at McDonalds for $8.50 hr? Oh I know who, the over sized single mother of 4 who cant get help form her 3 differnt "dady's" because no strip club would want her. The fact that most women are so hateful towards these clubs are because their jeolous. They cannot stand their men looking at other women in compromising positions and think their men would be turned on. Perhaps if these women would take more time showig effection towards their men and not make sex such a chore, there would be no need for them visiting these places. They dont need help, perhaps they need a new partner???? And NO to the granny panties. Might I suggest a nice "lillte bo-peep" outfit to properly set the mood. However, dance clubs are a right of passage for emerging young men. A sight to see and encounter for sure. Have you ever "engaged" with your partner after he had been to a strip club or stag? Try it. Chances are it will be awesome. I would bet you one free lap dance on it.
ReplyDeleteso much to write........What about Male Dance Clubs? I assume if you have the nerve to attend a female club you certainly engaged in a male club? Talk about animals!!!!! Those women are crazy. Crazy and dirty. And oh those poor men who are standing there with 6 pack abs, a donkey head thong and glissening with oil. I feel bad for them. Being subjected to such behaviour. I bet while they comb their long hair and shave their perfectly formed pectorals, they look in the mirror and say " i wish I had more self asteem".
I agree with your push to donate to help those poor women and girls who face challenges. They are the ones who need the help. Take a close look at a dancer. They need no help, they know what their doing. Leave them alone.
Lastly, I disagree with your assesment of a strip club vs. a stag party. Stags are much worse. A club has rules, guidlines and more importantly, bouncers. Girls are not to get drunk or they lose the rest of the night. Touching is very limited and they must mingle with the guests to make the most money. Stags on the other hand are private shows that have no rules. At least none that are enforced. Their are no bouncers, no drinking limit and touching is strictly at the discreation of the dancer. Usually being more liberal after her 4th beer and 3rd shot. Ahhh the stag.....so much more to "experience" then a strip club.
Ok, I rambled enough. I have to go collect some dollars for my "business mans lunch" up north.