No Job Too Low

This week the disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff started his new career upon leaving prison:  pizza boy.  Based on the lack of moral judgement and the illegal nature of his work ethics as a political big shot, I would say he deserves to be sweating it out tossing dough above a hot oven.

Then again, I can't image how he must feel.  How do you go from being a mover/shaker with a huge income and lot of political pull to a $10 an hour cook?   His new professional network probably consists of high school kids.  Can you image what it would be like to be 16 years old creating pies next to Abramoff?

I can't help but see his situation similar to the non-working mom.  You're an education woman who was at the height of your career (Jackie boy as a accomplished lobbyist) ... then you had your baby (Jack's poor ethical decision) ... then you decide to stay at home to raise your child (prison sentence for our "hero") and then you decide you want to re-enter the workforce (released from prison and trying to rebuild his life).  Certainly I am not saying that having a child is a prison sentence, but it is interesting that both individuals are looking at the same career opportunities, even though one focused on family and the other focused on fraud.

Want Ads

I love the term Want Ads.  How awesome would it be to send out all your wants and just have people apply to grant them... I want a pair of Christian Loubotins...I want to lose 10 pounds...I want to forgive ... I want to less stressed... and BOOM you get what you want. Maybe in a parallel universe.

Although I like the term, I have not reviewed or responded to a job posting in about 10 years.  My career has moved via found opportunities through colleagues or friends.  Over the past few months, I have had friends suggest several positions.  One I really wanted but a huge miscommunication about money dictated a pass on my side.  The other opportunity showed great potential until I met the 5th SVP and realized that their bureaucracy and my impatience would never work.  Six weeks later they came to the same conclusion.

So here I sit, ready to work again...or am I?  Looking at my summer schedule I will be employed as a cab driver for a teenager.  Crew camp 9 -12, algebra refresher 2 - 3:30, weight training 9 -11, football clinic 6-8, lacrosse games 2 full weekends out of town. With this in mind, what would my want ad look like?

Experienced executive wants full time position in progressive company.  Desires great responsibilities and challenging environment.  Will work when convenient for her.  Will consider all offers over six figures.  Will not suffer fools.  Will start immediately, unless it is a day in which she is already busy.


Any ideas on where I could find such a position?  Guessing the traditional Want Ads may not suit my purposes here.

Clown Doctors? Really?

I find this one of the most ridiculous things I have read and I have read about some lunatic ideas.  Before I rant though, let me say that I am a believer in alternative medicines such as laughter therapy but this is silly.

Apparently the University Of Haifa in Israel is offering the world's first academic degree in medical clowning.  Oh yeah I said c-l-o-w-n-i-n-g.  And in Isreal, because we all know that Israel is at the epicenter of humor.

So this "degree" features classes in the psychology of pain next to mime and juggling.  Laughter as a therapy may show positive results, so fine by me do what ever it takes to ease the patient.  However, if I am in the hospital and in pain I do not by any means want to see my physician rounding with some idiot in clown make up.  First and foremost isn't my physician supposed to instill confidence with his knowledge and honesty?  Not really what I am looking for in a clown.  If I am in the hospital, it is probably serious.  Call me crazy but I prefer to keep my prescription drugs away from my whoopie cushion.

How to you vet for entry into this degreed program?  I would think that high school grades or SAT scores wouldn't matter for the clown but would for the doctor.  Do you have to tell a joke on the interview or look good in a red nose and giant shoes?  Maybe the ability to juggle bumps you to the first choice.  Please oh please do not let clown doctor program be my son's safety school choice.

I don't believe we all have to be treated like children.  Go ahead and throw that Patch Adams movie at me.  Didn't see it nor will I.  There is a time and place and a level of intensity.  Let's grow up and stop thinking everything is a joke and must be addressed with humor.  Some things aren't funny and some experiences cannot be laughed away.